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Kevin Rudd and Criswell: can you spot the difference?

March 26th, 2009 · Greg Atkinson · 5 Comments

The mainstream media in Australia seems to finally be picking up on the fact that Kevin Rudd either makes little sense when he rambles or has the ability to make even the most simple things sound complicated. It is not easy to understand Ruddish, but I think I have found some background information that should help people understand this strange dialect.

After pondering how the universe was created last weekend I decided to move onto something much more important and seek the origins of Ruddish. (also known as Ruddspeak) At first I thought it might be a form of Elvish as our Prime Minister does look a bit like an Elf (just imagine him with pointy ears), but then I watched Lord of the Rings again and realised that Elves actually make a lot of sense…so no linkage with our P.M there. (and my apologies to any Elves I may have offended)

However I finally found the video clip posted below, which is the introduction by The Amazing Criswell to Ed Wood’s classic (?) B grade science fiction movie “Plan 9 From Outer Space” and suddenly I could hear what sounded to me very much like total Ruddish. 

Watch the clip now and you be the judge. By the way if you  change the last line to “can you heart stand the shocking fact about neo-liberals from outer space” then I think you will see that Criswell and Rudd appear to share similar views on the global economic crisis as well.

Okay, so you might be thinking that Criswell tends to repeat himself a lot and that surely I am mad to compare him the Kevin Rudd?  Well now have a look at this clip of Rudd in action. (and try and keep count how many times he uses the words – crisis, economic and future)

As an added bonus I have attempted to translate some of what the Prime Minister says from Ruddish into English.

Ruddish: Australia is facing an unfolding national and international economic emergency.

English: Australia is facing a global recession.

Ruddish: There is much lack of confidence across the world and in our own country today because of the avalanche of bad news on peoples televisions, in their radio stations and in their newspapers.

English: There is a lack of confidence across the world due to a lot of bad news in the media.

Ruddish: This strategy, this plan today, as part of a broad strategy on which we’ve embarked last year, provides a basis to see this Australia through this economic crisis.

English: We have been throwing money around since last year.

Ruddish: The government remains determined to take what ever further measures are necessary to continue to support growth and jobs and the stability of financial markets into the future.

English: If this package does not work we will borrow more money and spend again.

So what do readers think? Is Criswell the original source of Ruddish? Who makes more sense Criswell or Rudd? Could Criswell and Rudd be possibly related and finally, should we start calling Kevin Rudd “The Amazing Ruddwell? I am open to suggestions 🙂

5 responses so far ↓

  • 1 8020 Financial // Mar 27, 2009 at 8:52 pm

    Both funny and sad at the same time.
    Saint Kev seems to like the word ‘strategy’ as well. I counted at least six mentions of it.
    Its clear though, we have a prime minister during a crucial time in our history who is completely and utterly out of his depth. He looks scared and confused.
    I have never been so frightened of what our government might do next.

  • 2 Greg Atkinson // Mar 28, 2009 at 8:41 pm

    8020 I am fightened by the fact that apparently so many people in Australia think Rudd is doing a good job…now that really scares me!

  • 3 Senator13 // Mar 30, 2009 at 1:11 pm

    It is scary.

    I have also noticed that he uses the word ‘core’ a lot too. He often combines both ‘core’ and ‘strategy’ lol. I think he uses all these words so that when he is asked a question people forget what the question was because the answer is so long and his answer sounds like it has a lot of meaning to it, but when you actually look at what he says it does not mean anything. It is just pure Ruddish. I think we need Greg as an interpreter when he holds his next press conference.

    Also, everybody is using the term “neo” at the moment. I think it has been inspired by Rudd’s little catch phrase of recent weeks – “neo liberal”. Now to me, that is not actually a good term to describe what it is he is actually against. To me I would think he is actually against “traditional capitalism” not new liberalism…?

    His “crypto communist” traits are coming through more and more every day – just read his little essay… Be warned but, you will need your Ruddish to English dictionary on hand!

  • 4 Greg Atkinson // Oct 1, 2009 at 5:09 pm

    Senator I sense his Ruddish is actually getting worse. I have trouble watching him now during question time in parliament. I am also starting to think Senator Conroy might be a Cyberman. (one of the not so bright ones that is)

  • 5 Senator13 // Oct 1, 2009 at 11:14 pm

    You are right, he is getting worse. He is even making up his own words. AND his own version of history. Did you know that it was Kevin Rudd and the Australian Labor Party that invented the wheel, were the first to take flight and also the first to land on the moon. Move over Alexander Graham Bell and Albert Einstein – because it was Rudd all along. What is he going to take credit for next??

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